Yup, Gups

The conversation started like this,

Nathan: "Mom, am I allergic to fish?"
Tra: "No."
Nathan: "Is Aunt Kim allergic to fish?"
Tra: "No."
Nathan: "Well, Mom, I want a fish."

So, at the dinner table one night, Nathan presented me with the pet solution. Fish. It works for everyone. He was pleasantly surprised and shocked by my immediate agreement to this new aquatic adventure. Nathan wanted one goldfish. I did not want a goldfish.

See, we have had a fish before. It was a goldfish named Dora or Dollie or Dottie or something like that. For those of you who don't know, goldfish are nasty little creatures. They are the aquatic equivalent to a garbage truck in use for the past 43 years that has never been cleaned, upgraded, or loved. Stinky. They burp and poop at a remarkable rate. I think I once saw it sit back and scratch itself like a slob on an old couch. I had to clean the tank about every 34 1/2 minutes.

Sadly, well not so much sadly as joyously, Ditto met her maker on a sunny Saturday afternoon. Nathan didn't seem to notice. She was there and then she wasn't. The tank was dirty and then it was clean. I am glad he didn't see her floating in the tank. From what I remember, Nathan never said anything about her abrupt departure from his room. I kept the food, the water conditioner and the tank for months; just in case he wanted a replacement. About six months to a year later, I gave the tank away and Tra threw out the food and other supplies.

Saturday we had the joy of buying all of those supplies again. This time we went for the five gallon tank. We picked out a little plant, some gravel, and other decoration. Then, we headed for the fish! We looked at goldfish - keep moving people! We looked at Mollies and Platies and Tetras and Cichlas and Guppies. Nathan wanted one fish. Then, two. Then, three.

The nice lady at Petsmart told us the rule-of-thumb is one inch of fish per gallon of water. So, in our case, we could have five one inch fish or one five inch fish or a couple of two inchers. You get the idea. We decided to go for the one inch size.

Me (fish tank under arm): "Could you help us pick out some fish?"
Nice Petsmart Lady: "Sure. Is this for that fish tank?"
Me: "It is."
NPsL: "Oh. Well you need to first condition the water and let it sit for 24 hours before getting any fish. This is always tough for the kids."
Me: "OK." - in my head, "Crap."

Today Nathan and I went back and picked out four nice little Guppies. Two males and two females. Flippy (the orange one), Rainy (the rainbow one), Sunshine (the yellow one) and Dot (the silver one with the orange tail with black spots). They are all currently swimming happily in the tank in Nathan's room. Guppies are cleaner, smaller and more active than goldfish.

RIP Darlene or Dorothy or Danielle or Dancy or whatever your name was. Ya dirty girl.